In my life experiences, I have many friends who are the oldest child in the family. And in our age group, I've noticed that many of those oldest daughters especially, have issues with their parents. I've been observing, and also trying to figure it out, since I hear many complaints that so-and-so's parents did this wrong, and that wrong, and forced some idea or another on them as a child. It troubles me, because now as a parent myself, I would hate it if my child came back to me as an adult with such accusations and am appalled that a child from a loving home would think those things of their parents who tried their best. My mom always says, "we made the best decisions we could with the information we had available". I think that is very true then, and today. How do we think we are going to get any better results? Are we somehow wiser than they were? (I think not)
Also, I can't imagine blaming my parents for my life today (good, bad or otherwise). We all make choices in life, and reap the consequences, and blaming someone else is just avoiding dealing with yourself. (something politicians are really good at) There are people with perfectly awful parents and childhoods, in yet they've made the choice to have a good life and do. Then there are ungrateful children, who are offered every good thing in childhood, and do nothing but complain.
Anyways, I just can't figure it out. So, if you are an oldest daughter, maybe you can enlighten me further. I married an oldest child (who doesn't have these issues), but am also raising one, who I don't want to have them either.
