My own guide to a better birth

With each baby, it seems that I need extra motivation to make changes to help things run more smoothly.  That means that the labor would go "better" and that the baby would be less fussy and more pleasant.  This means reading more books and websites, and talking to more people.  For some reason, this makes the whole overwhelming process more doable, when I have more tools in my belt, so to speak.   Kind of like having more appliances in my kitchen.  I think that I can do fine with what I have, but then I get a new ice cream maker for my birthday, and just don't know how I ever lived without it!

There are things that in the past have worked well, and I'm sticking with them.  After 4 kids, you start to learn what works and what doesn't.  There's always a chance of some random wild card being thrown in there, but for the most part, the process is getting more smooth.  I shudder at my naivety with our first baby, thinking that I was well-educated back then.  Thankfully God does give us more chances, and I'm thankful that He has led me to various resources to help with my own health situation as well as the coming baby's.  It also seems that the more I rely on Him, the more answers He gives.  I should know that, but somehow want to lean on my own understandings and knowledge way too much and it doesn't work so well.

This pregnancy I was able to decrease morning sickness drastically by upping my probiotics and adding lots of magnesium to my diet (unintentionally, but it worked).  This blog helped alot 7 Real Food Remedies for Morning Sickness as well as this one (although I discovered it much after the first trimester was over).  The Cause and Cure of Morning Sickness.  Halfway through everything I discovered Green Vibrance that I'm still singing the praises of.  I had been so tired that I needed a nap every single day, and now I only need one rarely when I've overdone it, or we've been lacking sleep from sick kids/toddlers climbing in bed/things like that.  Eating protein in the night was really helpful for keeping blood sugars stable too (usually I'd just chug some kefir from the bottle (since no one else drinks it around here) or eat a few spoons of Greek yogurt when I got up in the night and that worked the best).

The things that I already do and have continued with are:

1) Chiropractic care - This recently was a huge blessing.  Our baby has been transverse or breech at every checkup and after 32 weeks this becomes a concern as the baby starts to lose space to turn around.  Our chiropractor specializes in women's health and children, so she was able to do the Webster Technique on me, and the next day the baby flipped over to the head down position.  She basically just adjusts your pelvis to make sure everything is lined up to assist in better blood flow, better nerve conduction and more room for the baby to get (and stay) in the proper position for birth.  The chiropractor does not touch the baby, but instead just facilitates it's environment so that it can move freely on it's own. (This is different from a Version or ECV in that they actually forcefully turn the baby under ultrasound and it's much harder on mom and baby.) I recommend finding a certified chiropractor and getting an adjustment if you are pregnant or about to become so.  They can help with back and joint pain, as well as just strengthening all those muscles/ligaments that need attention when a baby is weighing on your body.

2) Bradley birth technique - I learned about this 2 babies ago, and it has really helped me get through labor.  I didn't attend their classes, but just read the books and that was helpful enough.  Husband Coached Childbirth and Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way.  If you only want one book, the second one is much more useful in actual methods.  (or you can borrow them from me, when I get them back, as they are lent out right now).

3) Birthing ball - love this thing for exercising on before baby is born, as well as the comfort it gives during labor.  Would not go without it.  I'm also doing walking on the rebounder since it's easier than dragging 4 kids on a walk many days.

4) A competent midwife or doula - Although our midwife didn't make it here in time for Isaac's birth, I have confidence in her skills and abilities to intervene if problems should arise.  Having a doula in the hospital for our last birth there was well worth it too.  She was my advocate when I couldn't talk and also really helped Greg know how to help me.  In the hospital, you never know what kind of nurse or doctor you might get, so having someone who can advocate for you is priceless (in my opinion). 

New things I'm trying this time around:  

1) Spinning babies - this is full of exercises and explanations as to why babies have/cause difficult births and how you can avoid them.  Just chock full of good information

2) Gentle birth formula - herbs to assist with labor, delivery and nursing.  I've taken red raspberry tea with all the kids, as well as a pregnancy tea, so this is hopefully kind of the same thing.  I've heard good stuff about it, and our midwife says she's seen good results with it too.  (no false labor- just the real thing, more effective contractions, less bleeding, better milk supply after birth were her observations)
3) Eating dates - "Women who ate dates daily for the last several weeks of pregnancy were more dilated when labor began, less likely to need medication to get labor going, and their labor tended to be an average of seven hours shorter then the non-date eaters. The study found a compound in the dates that imitates oxytocin (which helps with labor)."  It can't hurt to try, since dates are yummy!
4) Eating more gelatin - Since most of the meat we eat is muscle meat, our society is drastically missing out on collagen/gelatin.  I've been trying to eat 1 Tbsp. each day, and have noticed way less stretch marks this time (actually disappearing rather than reappearing).  Wellness Mama (my favorite blog) has a great article on the benefits of it too.  I just add it to my green drink each day, but you could soften it in cold water first (just a couple Tbsp. of water, and then add your morning coffee to the cup and dissolve it too for an easy way to get it down.  Making homemade jello (with juice) is a more enjoyable way to eat it!

As far as baby stuff, our bassinet gave out recently (it was being used for a stuffed animal containment basket in the kids room) so I'm shopping for a new/used one.  We use one for the first part of the night, and then co-sleep the rest, depending on how tired/fussy/rested everyone is!  I know I could probably survive without one, but I do sleep best with a little more room for at least part of the night and I've loved having one in the past.

I read "The Happiest Baby on the Block" before Isaac was born and that was one of the best (of many, many!) books I've read.  Babywearing has also been a lifesaver (a wrap for newborns and and Ergo/mei tai for older babies).  Swaddling has been so helpful (those new kind with the velcro are awesome!)  Also, for older babies, I really like "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" for teaching babies to sleep on their own.

That's all I can think of for now...hoping and praying this birth goes nice and smooth.

Mutual Understandings

One thing I love about a good relationship is the common ground on which the relationship is formed.  Maybe it isn't really formed there, but that common ground is what caused the relationship to flourish.  There's things you needn't even discuss, because you know you'll see eye to eye on certain topics.  Occasionally, random different opinions come in, but for the most part, the unspoken understandings take precedence.

I got to thinking this the other day while I was out shopping with the kids.  A cashier at a minimum-wage store was super excited/distressed/emotionally charged because her husband had gone and traded in her old car for a brand-new fully-loaded Subaru while she was at work.  She couldn't believe it, and was excited, but I could also sense some how-are-we-ever-going-to-make-the-payments thoughts in there too.  When I got home and was telling Greg about it, he said, "You know I'd never do that to you, don't you?"  And I replied that yes, I knew I never had to worry about him doing that.  'Nuff said.

Then, later on in the week, he says to me, "What's with all these pregnant women posting self-portraits and ultrasound pictures on Facebook?  Why do they think we want to see that?"  This time it was me saying, "You know I'd never do that, don't you?"  To which he answered that, yes, he knew he never had to worry about me doing that (although I do post other things that he deems controversial and unnecessary!)  

We have a few more things like that too.  He knows never to have a surprise party (or plan a surprise trip) for me (I love the anticipation of things instead), and I know never to leave the house without my keys as well (even if he's driving and he has his keys).  That one has taken me many years to learn!  I know to always check the doors and woodstove at night (since I'm the last one to go to bed) and he knows that I'll always have a hot cup of coffee (in a glass "house" mug) every Sunday on the way to church and to not drive off (even if we're late) until I have a good balancing system in place so that it doesn't spill going out of our driveway.  We both know what kind of music to listen to when the other IS home, and what kind to listen to when the other ISN'T home!  No words are ever needed, just that deep down mutual understanding.

I have this with my close friends too.  The ones that I've known long enough that I know all those quirks/traits that make them such good friends.  The friends that always have a kind word to say, and then those who are rather tactless and usually have hurtful words to say (I try to stay away from those ones, but there's a number of them in my life that I still must deal with occasionally).  The friends that know when it's been too long and just need a good visit, and those you feel you must visit with because of obligation rather than desire.  The friends that lift you up, and the friends that pull you down and exhaust you.   It takes a balance of them all, although I highly recommend that you dose yourself with more uplifting friends than pulling-down ones.  And forgive their mistakes.  And pray that they forgive yours.  And be thankful for those mutual (unsaid) understandings that make your friendship what it is.

Christmas letter 2013

Christmas 2013

 Hello and wishing greetings of God’s love and peace to you!  It seems that it is time again to write to you, and send our love to you as well. 

Our vacation this year consisted of a trip toArizona by way of San Diego, CA.  We flew there first, and then drove the rest of the way to AZ and back.  We were able to be in Arizona for Greg’s parent’s retirement party, our nephew’s baptism, and Luke’s 8^th birthday.

Luke has been busy working on “projects” this year.  He’s been helping his Dad and Grandpa Somero build a sunroom on our deck.  He also is going to be painting his “new” dresser (which is quite beat up right now), as well as building & fixing other things.  He is enjoying archery with Dad, and is getting to be pretty good at it.

          James is your typical 6 year old.  He’s both excited and nervous about his first loose teeth.  He’s taking off with his reading, and quite thrilled with the world opening up for him by being able to read. (I love being witness to these adventures!) He spends most of his time upside down doing flips/kicks/headstands, and has an abundance of energy to burn on a consistent basis! 

Elise joins right in on whatever her brothers are doing.  She also loves helping Mom (washing dishes, sorting laundry, bossing her brothers and such).  She has started piano lessons this fall and loves to play the piano and sing.  She is quite excited about our new baby coming, and has things all planned out for when he/she arrives.

          Isaac keeps us laughing in 2 year old style.  He is learning new words each day, and has definite ideas on how things should and shouldn’t be done.  His names for his siblings are Du (Luke), Day (James), Dee (Elise) and Die (Isaac).  It’s a good thing we named them all with different vowel sounds!

          New baby #5 will be joining us in mid-February.    I’m so thankful for the ability to homeschool, so that we can adjust everything in our own time, rather than running by somebody else’s schedule when things get crazy.  (as happens on occasion with 4(+1) little ones).  Today I’ve been especially thankful for the days like today where we just stay home and work, school, play, exercise, nap and grow together.  Life seems so busy sometimes, and I’m thankful for the ability to slow down (when it’s so cold and rainy outside) and take time to enjoy the little things.

          May God bless and keep you ever in His loving care!