Recently I've unintentionally come across 2 books on large families. One was recommended by a friend, and received great reviews on Amazon so I decided to purchase it from our local bookseller. The other was Christmas gift from my dear mother who is always trying to find ways to make life easier for her 3 daughters and 1 daughter-in-law who are all the mothers of young children at this time. I thoroughly enjoyed both books, and would highly recommend them to anyone, even those of us who don't have a large family, because they offer lots of child training tips, organizing tips, recipes and ways to better run a household.
The first book is called "A Sane Woman's Guide to having a Large Family" by Mary Ostyn. Mary is the mother of 10 children. She says how these days, a large family is anything more than 2. Well, you're allowed 3 if the first 2 are the same sex. How true I've found that. I can't tell you how many people have already asked me "Are you done, now that you have your girl?" As if having one of each is what life is all about, and it's any of their business anyways! Back to the book though, probably the most important thing to me, is what she shares about extracurricular activities. I've wondered at what age you should put your kids in programs, how many programs is "reasonable" and what type of programs are worth your time (and hard earned money!) I resolved long ago that my kids will never play organized hockey (thankfully I'm not raising them in Alberta, as that would be much harder to avoid), but other than that, didn't have much direction. What Mary says is this: Don't start organized programs until your kids are school age (or older if they are less mature, depending on the activity), unless you enjoy throwing your money out the window. Your kids will get just as much learning and enjoyment from you teaching them the skills yourself or playing with their friends. Their progress is so slow (due to lack of coordination and attention span) that your child will learn much more in less time if you just wait. I've seen this in my own experience in swimming lessons. You can teach a preschooler to swim, but you still would never trust them around water until they understand safety and dangers of water (about age 6, in most cases). So what is the point of swimming lessons for them other than the pleasure of it, which they can learn just as well going to public swim with you. She offers many other tips on what chores children can do at what ages, how to cook great meals for little money (if you have a weakness for Kung Pao Chicken, learn to make it and keep the ingredients on hand so you're not tempted to run to Panda Express when it isn't in the budget, etc.), as well as their own reasons for homeschooling her children (much the same as ours- including the Biblical values into all aspects our children's education and having control over the pace of each child, paying attention to their needs and learning styles, rather than the one-size-fits-all theory of public school). She has also figureed the cost of raising a child to age 18, which is much less than what most numbers you hear these days would tell us. What I like most about the book, is that she is normal. That's just plain hard to find these days...those who are not too extreme in any (visible!) way. Those who aren't obsessed with this aspect or that, but can see many viewpoints yet firmly stand on their own.
http://www.owlhaven.net/about/The other book is "The Duggars, 20 and Counting" by the Duggars. You likely know who they are by now, and if you haven't...that's okay too! I just was "introduced" myself, and now after reading thei
r book, feel like I know them as friends. Well, maybe not friends, but casual acquaintances. This book too, was an enjoyable read. The first half of the book is mostly their family history, the second is how they do things. It's important to read where they've come from, to see why they've done what they've done, but skimming that part is permissable! The second half intrigued me though. I especially like how they incorporate Christ into every aspect of life (including potty training!) They also homeschool, so that was encouraging to me as well. As beginners in this area, I've been a bit overwhelmed by the many options out there, but also reading more, am narrowing down our own education outlooks more too. Seeing what others do makes it more doable, and the results these people are getting are making me more devoted. Wonderful Christ centered lives, with strong work ethics and strong bonds of family that can't be matched by any public school agenda. They also share many recipes, which are great for company (who needs pans that huge for just our little families?!), but alot of them are also sized to 9x13 pans, which are totally doable. You also know they are cheap to make, because they have to be. The fact that the family lives debt free (and has for years) is also encouraging to me, as that is our goal too, if we can stay on track! ("Buy used and save the difference", I love it!) God provides for all His children, when they trust Him. Mrs. Duggar also shares how they get chores done each day, and how they stay organized, as well as the back of the book has a good many references to resources they have found helpful in all areas of life (spiritual, practical, cooking, organization, etc).Another great idea Mrs. Duggar shares is her "Playpen in Your Purse" otherwise known as blanket time. It involves teaching your baby/toddler to sit quietly on a blanket each day (increasing the time spent, within reason), so that they know how to sit quietly for whatever reason you may need them to (church, doctors office, during homeschool, etc). It keeps the baby from running all over the place, while also teaching them self-control. I've started with Elise, and am only up to 5 minute increments, but am excited to try it, as we'll need her to behave with school starting in the fall.
Their website is also a wealth of information, if you aren't into reading the book. I especially like the "Character Qualities" list they use for their kids, as there are many Biblical character traits that I wouldn't think of teaching specifically, in yet are so necessary to life. http://www.duggarfamily.com/index.html
So there you have it. I only shared here the more profound things that I have learned by reading these, although both books are full of much more. (I did know much of the information, only because I'm a tightwad Christian mother myself and have read many of the same books that these ladies have relied on too!)
