These past few days I've been laid out on the couch most of the days. Yep...caught some nasty flu bug leaving me with a fever, achiness, chills, severe headache and a whole lot of yuckiness. Today is the first day I'm feeling somewhat normal and it has given me a new perspective on things. One that was needed although I didn't know it.
The first thing I noticed was what happened when I told our eldest son Luke how much I loved him and how I
really appreciated him taking care of his little brothers and sister these past few days. I hugged him and he replied with tears in his eyes, "Mom, you aren't supposed to love me that much. It makes me cry." Wow! I love his sensitivity. I forgot about that, since he's always so responsible and busy doing his boy things. Sometimes he'll come to me at bedtime and say, "Mom, can I just have some time with you?" (sometimes he just wants to stay up later, but we have good visits anyhow) I love those moments and pray we can continue to have them all through his growing up years.
And then I started really observing. How well the kids get along with each other (for the most part, there's still a healthy amount of squabbling and competition, don't get me wrong!) I noticed how dark Luke's hair and eyes are (just like his Daddy's) and I just love it. And his smattering of freckles on his nose. I love how James wants to wear the same thing
every day. He thrives on routine, likely because he doesn't feel well much of the time and likes his "safe" zones. I also was pondering how helpless I feel as a parent to see him suffering with his allergies (which have expanded from just food allergies to now seasonal ones where his eyes swell all shut every few days now). We're working with a Naturopath so I'm hoping he (the Dr.) can get a handle on his overall health and that we're going in the right direction. It's just no fun to see your child suffer. I also noticed his dimple every time he smiles which isn't actually a dimple, but a scar from whacking into the deck rail last summer. I then noticed Elise's scruffy hair. She forgets to comb it (and so do I) and so she goes around with bedhead most days. And because of her bangs not growing much, I'm at a loss as what to do with it even when I do. This girl does try me, I'll admit. She has been much more difficult to potty train (about 18 times I'd say) than the boys were. She still (8 months later) goes through many pairs of pants in a day. Sigh. But she is so random, she brings so much joy to this house too. Her constant chatter is so sweet, except during prayers when she just can't keep her mouth shut (or ever for that matter). She wears her clothes backwards much of the time, and when you bring it to her attention, she says in a sing-songy voice, "dat's okay". Her other favorite saying is, "my wips is kind of dwy" (aka, "I need some chapstick" , a girl after my own heart!) And then little Isaac, he's been the most challenging while sick, because caring for a nursing baby when Mama has the flu is perfectly awful. He's been sweet and cheerful, but still needs Mama's care much of the time. He's getting ready to crawl, so we're excited and dreading it too. That means he can move around freely, but also that he'll be into
everything!
All this observing made me truly re-appreciate my (our) kids. It's seems like often we get caught up in the frazzled-ness/busyness of the day that we forget to just sit and enjoy them and watch them play. Or have them cuddle on our lap extensively. Or have them read to us (Luke just read a chapter to me out of a 300 page 3rd grade reader he's been reading (that has 1770 words in it) and knew all the words except one!) So I got out the camera and took some pictures to capture the "moments" that seem trivial in yet mean so much and make this Mommy job totally worthwhile.
To end the day, Elise smiles and says to me, "Mom, I'm so pwoud of you" (that's what I had told her earlier in the day after she had done what she was told to do, a rare moment these days)
James' question from yesterday, "why do they put the coffee cups upside down on little rugs at the Fireside Cafe?" to which Luke says, "you know those little fancy fabric things?"
