The other day I was visiting with a friend who had recently found her deceased dad at his apartment the week after Christmas. She shared how difficult it was to watch him drink himself to death, and how thankful she was to have amended the relationship before he died. She also shared that she has already lost a brother to drug abuse, and has 2 siblings who are also alcoholics, as she has been as well. She has been sober for almost 20 years, but addiction has taken its toll heavily on her family. Some of us have walked this same journey in one way or another, even though our walks may be very different. Even if we didn't have addicts in our home, we have all struggled to have self-control in areas of anger, food choices/control (over control or lack of control), exercise, OCD, work-aholism, or any other sorts of dysfunction that are not in a normal healthy balance that we've never gained control over. Many of us have also have family members or struggle ourselves with some sort of mental illness/weakness that takes it's toll on ourselves and our loved ones. None of us are exempt from this fallen world of sin and brokenness. None.
All this to say, after it was done, she said, "I think every Christian should be required to go through AA and follow the 12 steps. That would lead to a lot of healing from a lot of different things." AMEN! I knew a bit about these steps from my sister who has walked the journey of addiction and recovery with her brother-in-law. His insights on the recovery journey are profound and needed for any of us. I'm going to just go through them and invite you to ponder and pray through each step and how you may need to examine your own heart and find healing. (The original 12 steps said "God/Jesus" and but have been revised to say "Higher Power", which is not really an upgrade because a "Higher Power" cannot give us the power that Jesus gives. It's basically just saying that the power of positive thinking can wash away sin. This is one insight that my sister shared from her brother-in-law. If we don't ask for Jesus' power, we won't get it.)
Step 1
We admitted we were powerless over our addiction (sins) - that our lives had become unmanageable
Psalm 38 (A Psalm of David, to bring to remembrance.) O LORD, rebuke me not in thy wrath: neither chasten me in thy hot displeasure.2
For thine arrows stick fast in me, and thy hand presseth me sore.
3There is no soundness in my flesh because of thine anger; neither is there any rest in my bones because of my sin.
4For mine iniquities are gone over mine head: as an heavy burden they are too heavy for me.
5My wounds stink and are corrupt because of my foolishness.
6I am troubled; I am bowed down greatly; I go mourning all the day long.
7For my loins are filled with a loathsome disease: and there is no soundness in my flesh.
8I am feeble and sore broken: I have roared by reason of the disquietness of my heart.
9Lord, all my desire is before thee; and my groaning is not hid from thee.
10My heart panteth, my strength faileth me: as for the light of mine eyes, it also is gone from me.
11My lovers and my friends stand aloof from my sore; and my kinsmen stand afar off.
12They also that seek after my life lay snares for me: and they that seek my hurt speak mischievous things, and imagine deceits all the day long.
13But I, as a deaf man, heard not; and I was as a dumb man that openeth not his mouth.
14Thus I was as a man that heareth not, and in whose mouth are no reproofs.
15For in thee, O LORD, do I hope: thou wilt hear, O Lord my God.
16For I said, Hear me, lest otherwise they should rejoice over me: when my foot slippeth, they magnify themselves against me.
17For I am ready to halt, and my sorrow is continually before me.
18For I will declare mine iniquity; I will be sorry for my sin.
19But mine enemies are lively, and they are strong: and they that hate me wrongfully are multiplied.
20They also that render evil for good are mine adversaries; because I follow the thing that good is.
21Forsake me not, O LORD: O my God, be not far from me.
22Make haste to help me, O Lord my salvation.
Step 2
Came to believe that a Power (God Himself) greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity
Psalm 3:1-5 Lord, how are they increased that trouble me! many are they that rise up against me.
Many there be which say of my soul, There is no help for him in God. Selah.
But thou, O Lord, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.
I cried unto the Lord with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill. Selah.
I laid me down and slept; I awaked; for the Lord sustained me.
Step 4
Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves
Proverbs 4:23-27 Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.
Put away from thee a froward mouth, and perverse lips put far from thee.
Let thine eyes look right on, and let thine eyelids look straight before thee.
Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy ways be established.
Turn not to the right hand nor to the left: remove thy foot from evil.
Step 5
Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs
Psalm 32:3-5 When I kept silence, my bones waxed old through my roaring all the day long. For day and night thy hand was heavy upon me: my moisture is turned into the drought of summer. Selah. I acknowledge my sin unto thee, and mine iniquity have I not hid. I said, I will confess my transgressions unto the Lord; and thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin. Selah.
James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
**We know as Lutherans that confessing our sins is an integral part of repentance and remission of sins. God knows our sin already, but confessing it out loud gives us power over it as well as accountability for it. It's sure hard on the pride though!
Step 6
We're entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character
Matt 3: 1-6 In those days came John the Baptist, preaching in the wilderness of Judaea, And saying, Repent ye: for the kingdom of heaven is at hand. For this is he that was spoken of by the prophet Esaias, saying, The voice of one crying in the wilderness, Prepare ye the way of the Lord, make his paths straight. And the same John had his raiment of camel's hair, and a leathern girdle about his loins; and his meat was locusts and wild honey. Then went out to him Jerusalem, and all Judaea, and all the region round about Jordan, And were baptized of him in Jordan, confessing their sins.
Step 7
Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings
Matt 18: 1-4 At the same time came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them, And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
Step 8
Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all
Luke 15: 18 I will arise and go to my father, and will say unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and before thee, 19 And am no more worthy to be called thy son: make me as one of thy hired servants. 20 And he arose, and came to his father. But when he was yet a great way off, his father saw him, and had compassion, and ran, and fell on his neck, and kissed him. 21 And the son said unto him, Father, I have sinned against heaven, and in thy sight, and am no more worthy to be called thy son. 22 But the father said to his servants, Bring forth the best robe, and put it on him; and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet: 23 And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry: 24 For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found. And they began to be merry.
Step 9
Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others
Proverbs 14:9 Fools make a mock at sin: but among the righteous there is favour.
Step 10
Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it
Romans 12:2-3 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God. For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.
Step 11
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will for us and the power to carry that out
Matthew 4:1-11 Then was Jesus led up of the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the devil. And when he had fasted forty days and forty nights, he was afterward an hungred. And when the tempter came to him, he said, If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be made bread. But he answered and said, It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God. Then the devil taketh him up into the holy city, and setteth him on a pinnacle of the temple, And saith unto him, If thou be the Son of God, cast thyself down: for it is written, He shall give his angels charge concerning thee: and in their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone. Jesus said unto him, It is written again, Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God. Again, the devil taketh him up into an exceeding high mountain, and sheweth him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them; And saith unto him, All these things will I give thee, if thou wilt fall down and worship me. Then saith Jesus unto him, Get thee hence, Satan: for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve. Then the devil leaveth him, and, behold, angels came and ministered unto him.
Step 12
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other addicts (sinners!), and to practice these principles in all our affairs
Matthew 3:1-3 In those days came John the Baptist, preaching in the wilderness of Judaea, And saying, Repent ye: for the kingdom of heaven is at hand. For this is he that was spoken of by the prophet Esaias, saying, The voice of one crying in the wilderness, Prepare ye the way of the Lord, make his paths straight.
**You'll notice here that there is no blaming, no shaming, no shifting guilt. We need to each own our own sin. We are all sinners with a boatload of sin, whether we want to admit it or not. We can't be honest with others if we can't be honest with ourselves.
1Galations 6: 1-3 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.2
Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.
3For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.
**I got these Bible verses for each of these steps from 12 Steps.org if you'd like to read in more depth about them. They do have a commentary that someone has written up to help understand each one also.
This is also a good video about Rebellious vs Religious sins. Often we flop between the extremes as he mentions.
So, yes, I agreed with my friend. We Christians should all take a look at the 12 Steps and walk through them ourselves and search our hearts. (My apologies for the poor formatting of the Bible verses. I cut and pasted them and they didn't want to format well because of that.)
Psalm 139:23-24 Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
